I’m coming back on Tuesday but I realized I probably won’t get around to blogging until Wednesday, so as much as I wanted to write “See you next Tuesday,” it would be a lie. Plus I may even decide to take my computer with me at the last minute and actually find time to blog.
There is all kinds of drama looming with this trip to meet my mom’s family. I don’t want to go into it now, but there are things I’m worried about, disappointments looming, but of course I’m going ahead with it anyhow. There are good things, too.
My biggest fear is that it will be tedious, that I won’t connect, that it will not be meaningful in the ways I hope it will be. I think it’s a very irrational fear, but one I can’t help having. The fear of going through the motions. It’s like fearing a plane crash. It’s very unlikely, but terrifying anyhow because it’s something you really can’t do anything about.
Anyhow, this should be interesting.